In a 6-1 vote following months of controversy, it was determined that Abraham Lincoln High School, George Washington High School, and even Dianne Feinstein Elementary School all require new names that have no connection to slavery, oppression or racism.
With little to no input from historians, not to mention a complete lack of information in several cases – the committee was unsure whether Roosevelt Middle School was named after Theodore or Franklin Delano – the board full-fledged axed all the names with not even a second thought.
"I must admit there are reasons to support this resolution, but I can't," said community member Jean Barish, who called the process flawed and based on emotion rather than expertise. "These are not decisions that should be made in haste."
Because of George Floyd and Breonna Taylor, however, the board felt as though the renaming process was timely and overdue.
One of the schools, James Denman Middle School, has been a target for years because its first superintendent was "a racist leader who denied Chinese students a public education."
Schools named after Thomas Jefferson and James Madison were also targeted because these founding fathers were slave owners, like many were at that time in history.
"It's a message to our families, our students, and our community," boasted Mark Sanchez, one of the board members. "It's not just symbolic. It's a moral message."
"I think it's important to do the right thing," added Nguyen Louie, whose child attends Adolph Sutro Elementary school, which is named after a man who allegedly discriminated against black people.
"We should not honor him with the name of our elementary school."
When surveyed, upwards of 80 percent of local parents agreed that changing the names of area schools is the most important thing on the agenda right now because some people will continue to be offended if they are not changed.
"Give us a chance to come up with our own new name," Louie added. "One we can be proud of."
One possible name suggestion based on more recent historical events in San Francisco is Toxic Mercury Fog Middle School, named after the pollutants that rain over the city due to industrial chemical use across the Pacific in communist China. Another idea is Human Feces Charter School, named after the homeless people across San Francisco who poop all over the sidewalk.
Or maybe we could name one of them Urine Water Magnet School after Public Utilities Commission employee Martin Sanchez, who several years back was caught peeing on multiple occasions in the Priest Reservoir, which provides drinking water to nearly 2.5 million Bay Area residents.
The sky is the limit, really, as there are plenty of names like this to choose from that tap into the rich culture of modern-day San Francisco.
Back in 2018, the school board created a task force to come up with the best names, though this did not move forward until early 2020. The task force met multiple times last year and ultimately recommended that 44 school sites, constituting about one-third of the entire school district, get a name change.
According to board member Kevine Boggess, all of these schools should be renamed after something other than people because in his view, society "should not make heroes out of mortal folks."
This would of course mean that San Francisco itself must be renamed, seeing as how it was named after Saint Francis Assisi.
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